Recipe for Success

I was looking for new things I could find on the Korean singer, Tae Yang, on YouTube and found this english subtitled bit about his life (see below). It's inspirational that somebody who admits to no innate ability as a dancer/singer becomes the best in those areas by shear work and drive. Working 5 or more hours a day trying to get better. And now he has reached a high level of fame that most would be content with - he still says the best has yet to come. Still aspiring. It's a mind set and work ethic everybody could stand to adopt.

Size of Fat vs. Muscle

I've been trying to figure out how it is I am losing size but gaining weight. My first question was how big is a pound of muscle vs. a pound of fat. Above is a photo of 5lbs of fat vs. muscle and it appears that fat takes up twice as much room. To really get a sense of how big that 5lb of fat is - here is a picture I found of somebody holding it:

Every website I went to find out exactly how much bulkier fat is - they did not give out numbers. But the pictures say a lot.

I also wanted to find out the difference between muscle and lean muscle. It was described that regular muscle comes from weight lifting and a specific diet to build up mass. Lean muscle is developed by diet and multiple reps with light weights. It really is 'mission impossible' to try and find a valid answer to the size difference between the 2 (if there is at all). I just wonder does regular muscle have fat in it and that's why there's a need to label some muscle 'lean muscle'?

My real goal is to find out why I see the shape of my body go down yet my weight go up. I realize muscle takes up less room, etc. But I weigh so gosh darn much that it doesn't seem to the complete answer to my query. I don't feel I have the fat or muscle to justify my weight. But if one of the 2 could be labeled the culprit then it'd have to be muscle since I'd be wearing 3-4 clothing sizes larger then what I do now if what I weigh was based on fat.
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"Bramhall's World" Cartoon

My Fast Metabolism

I just ate a serving of white rice, sesame chicken and raspberries and I'm still hungry enough to eat another full meal. It's getting annoying to be hungry all the time. It used to be that if I had a bagel with cream cheese or an omelette for breakfast that I wouldn't be hungry again until about 2pm. And even then all I had to do was eat a snack and I'd be OK. I had an omelette this morning and, as you can see, it did not do the trick.

As strange as it may sound, I don't enjoy the act of eating enough to want to do it all the time. It's becoming a nuisance more then anything. I have to be in the mood to eat - and hunger doesn't necessarily put me in the mood. I guess it may sound like I have some eating disorder but I just have never been a big eater, ever. I remember Mom used to buy carnation instant for me because she was concerned about my low food intake. I think that's what they had Grandpa Holloway drink too, to make sure he was getting proper nutrition.

Hopefully my metabolism slows down to a normal pace so I am not hungry all the time anymore.

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High Blood Pressure Meds

I went to my cardiologist yesterday to see if the high blood pressure medication he gave me last month worked. It was the lowest dose possible and it turns out that it did help. I experienced some side effects from the medication so now he's got me on a new high blood pressure medication.

The first one he gave me caused my feet to swell up and my ankles were easily made sore from walking. Anybody whose had extreme water gain in the feet knows what feeling refering to. It's really unpleasant to walk more then 6 blocks with this discomfort. I can only imagine the water gain the rest of my body must've had from the meds - maybe I'll notice my clothing a little loser after I've not being on the meds for a few days.

So now I have to take this new medication for 2 weeks and then go back to the doctor. If this has the same success of lowering my blood pressure as the other one did (with no adverse side effects) then I will likely be put on the next higher dose. My current blood pressure is 130/80 (after first mediction) and he wants to get the second number down to 70. So we'll see what happens.

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Summer Coming to an End

I can't believe the summer is almost over, it's gone by so fast. I only have 2 more weeks of going to class Mon. - Fri. at Taekwondo. I will be glad to have some weekdays where I can just go home and relax. I am really surprised that I was able to keep it up all summer - I was sure there would be many days where I'd have a hard time motivating myself to go. But that has not been the case. I guess part of it is that it helped that the lady who normally handles the office hasn't been in that much this summer. She makes me uncomfortable with the way she acts toward me sometimes so it makes me not look forward to going there. When a friend of mine came to watch me in my class a couple weeks ago and the admin. was there - even she noticed how funky the admin. treated me.

I don't know if I lost weight working out so much - it's hard for me to tell. I think I have. But I'll still be working out a good amount even when Jazzmin is around. I am going to take Gumdo Mon. & Wed. and Taekwondo Fri. & Sat. This will put an end to my having to rush after work to attend classes as all of them are after 8pm. Saturday's class is at 9am though - have to get up early for her dance class anyway. So it's not a big deal. And that's another thing, this year we have ample time btw. Taekwondo and dance class - no more running 'like a bat out of hell' from one class to another. That is a bonus for me because I hate to rush. I hate having to worry about making it someplace at a specific time - it makes me anxious and I just hate rushing. Given a choice, I always give myself ample time to avoid it.

My Gumdo belt test has been postponed - it was supposed to be this Friday but the teacher administering the test couldn't make it. My teacher can not perform the belt promotion test - it has to be his teacher, who has a school in Long Island. The test will be sometime in September. I'm glad it's been postponed because I don't feel as comfortable with my knowledge of things as I'd like. Especially with the added stress of having to do it in front of a teacher I am not familiar with and is said to be tough. I also don't want to make my teacher look bad by doing poorly in the testing.

I am going to go with Brenda & Andy to pick up Jazzmin Labor Day weekend. Can't believe I am going to see Jazzmin in less then 2 weeks. It feels like she hasn't been gone that long. Hillary is going to come up so we can see our new nephew. We will possibly visit with our maternal aunt and uncle while we're there.

Another bit of news is my landlord wants to offer me a 2 year lease at a 1 year lease renewal price. I just signed my lease renewal for this year - but only did so for one year. It seems a little fishy that they'd make such an offer. But, of course, I am going to take it - at least this way I don't have to worry about my rent going up next year or signing another lease renewal.

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"Like Sand Through the Hourglass....

... so are the days of our lives." If you've heard the quote before then you watch too many soaps. :)

Nothing exciting going on with me but still I opted to write this update for you. Well I guess something exciting happened, or at least, it'd be exciting for an American Idol fan. Which I'm not. But this year at my company's promotion day our special guest was Jennifer Hudson who was in American Idol and won the Oscar for her role in "Dream Girls". Unlike guests in prior years, she performed. Prior we had Bill Cosby and Queen Latifah who gave motivational speeches about their lives, how they overcame adversity and how we can apply that to our lives. To be honest, Jennifer Hudson was a let down 'cause I'm not into her type music. And I was hoping for an inspirational speech by a celebrity I liked. Oh well.

I had a friend from Chicago come and visit me last weekend. I met her when I lived in Chicago a while back - we worked together in a telemarketing firm. Telemarketing - now that's some fun AND you get paid to do it. Just doesn't get better then that. :^p Thankfully I was just responsible for mailing things overnight to customers. I did do telemarketing briefly to do phone surveys for a radio station. I feel sorry for anybody who has to do telemarketing for a living.

So anyway, this was her first time in NYC and I tried to show her the sights. Saturday we went to Chinatown, Little Italy and SoHo - which meant we were constantly on our feet for 3-4 hours. I had a gift card to this really nice asian restaurant Tao, so we went there for dinner. A friend of mine pays me to do her english homework - she is taking an online class. So she opted to give me a gift certificate to Tao. I know it may seem wrong to do somebody else's homework but she's studying to be a vet. tech. so it's not like her essay skills are essential. She was actually wanting me to take the class for her all together and pay me for it but I turned that down. Then I'll be obligated to do the work. Now it's just my choice - when I have time. We had a good amount to eat and used up the $50 gift card. After that I took her to Times Square so she could take some photos of the tourist variety. "oooh bright shiney lights."

There was this one funny bumper sticker we saw in Chinatown, it said "Since they call it tourist season, why can't we shoot them?" If you've ever been to a tourist area in NYC you would understand. :)

Sunday we went to Fordham Road in the Bronx - it's a popular shopping area. She found several things there to buy. Then we went to Arthur Avenue which is the Bronx's Little Italy. Unfortunately a lot of things were closed. :(

Hopefully she had fun and got a good sense of NYC. I couldn't really think of other places to take her. Especially since she didn't express any interest in seeing anything specific.

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Hunger & My Weight Loss

I am so hungry right now. In fact, I find myself to be hungry most of the time. The supplements I am taking (flaxseed oil, CLA & B complex) are obviously doing their job in speeding up my metabolism. A breakfast that would normally keep me satisfied until late afternoon now only does so for a couple hours. I had a ham, onion, ham and cheese egg white omelette and a yogurt around 10am. Now it's noon and I'm starving - as if I hadn't eaten all day. ^*^sigh^*^

But I know if I want to lose weight I can't binge when my tummy is screaming for food like this. So I have to suffer the hunger in order to reach my weight loss goal. I am going to have my trusty hot chocolate - that always helps chase away the hunger. It's actually relatively low in calories and has the added bonus of giving me my chocolate fix (admitted chocolate addict).

I hope this is all worth it. At the end of the summer I hope I will have lost lots of weight and be noticeably skinnier. I can never tell if I've lost weight unless it's significant - so I am not sure if I've lost weight. I think I have. Another problem is getting on the scale isn't a valid measure of my weight loss because I am not only losing fat - but gaining muscle from my workouts. I have been keeping up the 5 workouts a week - only 3.5 weeks to go. Of course I will be working out 4 times a week once September starts up - but it will be more spread out. Instead of Mon., Tues., Wed., Thurs, & Fri. it will be Mon., Wed., Fri. & Sat. And no kick boxing after this month - only Gumdo and Taekwondo.

Well, wish me luck on my weight loss!! :)
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Favorite Video/Song of the Moment

I end up watching this video at least a couple times a day! I love it! It's by this Korean artist Tae Yang (singer from band Big Bang), the song is "Prayer".

I ordered the CD last week - hopefully it will come in soon!

Thinking about Dad

I was watching this documentary on the Irish in America and I saw some guys with long mustaches - reminded me of Dad when his mustache was like that. As I got to think about Dad I was remembering the time he came to my apt. with Dawn and Hillary to fix up Jazzmin's bedroom. At one point Dad and I went to the corner store to get beer (so unlike Dad, I know). What struck me that day was how the guy at the counter benevolently treated Dad like an old man. It startled me at that moment because I had never once thought of Dad as old or had I ever witnessed anybody treated him as old. It was just weird. Part of me felt bad to witness that - I imagine everybody wrestles with the concept of going from a regular adult to people starting to treat you as a geriatric. I felt bad because I wonder how it must've made Dad feel to transition into being looked at in that way. Dad didn't appear to mind being treated like an old man by the counter guy though.
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Candids from Illinois